Have you ever seen a slow motion movie of a lightning strike? Most people think that lightning hits the earth wherever it wants, hitting the highest point in an area, or the best conductor, or whatever—in any case, it’s the lightning coming out of the cloud and hitting the earth—the lightning strikes the earth, the earth just sits there. However, if you watch a stop action movie of a lightning strike the whole event looks very different: way before the lightning comes down out of the sky and strikes the earth, the earth sends up what’s called a ground leader—you can’t see it with your naked eye, but you can see it on a video/movie. This ground leader reaches up from the earth to the sky, and if it’s strong enough the lightning “senses” it and connects with it. What you see with your naked eye is only one-half of the event. I wonder if the earth has a desire to reach the sky and sends up the ground leader, and the sky has a desire to reach the earth but can’t until a ground leader goes out?
So you send out your ground leader to God, your desire to be with God, and what you feel in you and around you—the love and the glow—is what you can sense so far of God’s responding to your ground leader. I’d wager that as your awareness grows you’ll sense more and more—and you’ll change—and your thoughts about God will change, and your perceptions and ideas of God will change. The trouble with your changing is that at some point it’ll be very hard to be “here” when everything you want is with God. But you can’t be one with God or “merge” with God the way you can with another human or soulmate, or whatever—it’s not that kind of thing. I think you’ll discover that God isn’t the supreme object, but rather the supreme subject—so that if you want to merge with God what you have to do is follow yourself—your Self—to God. If you do that you’ll probably find that the ground leader going out and the lightning coming down are one and the same.